Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Stress

This blog on the Thinking Mom's Revolution really got me today. It is very true. As an Autism mom there has been a lot of stress that just comes with the territory. Whether you are talking chronic lack of sleep because your child does not sleep, stress over how you will pay for what truly helps your child (and is never covered by insurance if you even have insurance), stress of handling multiple behaviors (whether it is aggression, OCD, anxiety, meltdowns, etc) and we haven't even touched anything beyond Autism yet. Then there are the everyday stressors, family illness, job loss, or just pain in the ass people who seem to have nothing better to do than to be jerks. It adds up. But this blog is right, it encourages us to focus on the good rather than all of the bad. Now, putting this into practice is a little bit easier said than done, I'm a far cry from some Zen master to be sure. But, we are Autism moms, we are strong. We have done what our mainstream pediatricians could not in many, many cases. We have taken our kids to a place where some thought they would never be. I don't know about you but I will be damned if I am going to be dragged down by the BS. So this is your reminder Autism Moms, take YOUR vitamins, maybe throw in some extra B-12 for good measure. Sneak a little of your child's Glutathione, take your antioxidants and try and get some sleep. Our kids are counting on us to be there for a long time! And above all, don't buy into the drama and BS that even runs rampant in our own community, let alone the stuff people on the outside throw at us. If they don't know, they better ask somebody, we're Autism tough, and it doesn't get much tougher!

Friday, August 10, 2012

One decade later.....





Wow, 10 years of marriage. This time exactly 10 years ago I was sitting in a hotel room, anxious for the day to start, sharing the morning with 3 of my best friends. Giggling like school girls, nervous anticipation, wondering what the next chapter of my life would be like.

10 years has brought all that one might expect, joy, fun, excitement, sorrow, heart break, loss. And through it all my husband has been strong and true by my side. Our life has been like a roller coaster. Lots of ups and downs, especially facing Autism and healing our son. But he and I have a bond that is unbreakable. We take whatever is thrown at us and turn it into something good and something that makes us stronger. We work as a team, we always have. And yes, we have had some pretty big adversity. But the people who want to tear you down usually do so because they are lacking that relationship in their lives. So we use whatever is thrown at us to give us more motivation and purpose to the life and family we have created. Period. End of story.

The vows we took 10 years ago still hold true. But, there is so much more to them than what we said 10 years ago. Our marriage is so much deeper now. There is much more meaning to our lives and what we created with the words "I do". Today I vow to not only to love, honor and cherish my husband but to be the one to build him up when this world tries to tear him down. I vow to always look at his side of things even when I don't really want to. I vow to remember that the past is the past and that's where it should stay even when parts of it rear its ugly head. I vow to never let the past in any way impact our marriage. I vow to protect him and my family with every ounce of strength I have and Lord knows I have a lot. I vow to always remember exactly why I fell in love with him, his caring nature, his intelligence, his sense of humor, his ability as a father and his depth of love for me to name just a few. He shows me every day how much he loves me. Not in flowery words or flowers delivered but in the little things that keep our love alive. It is in the way he knows what I am thinking just by a look, the way we can say just 1 word and communicate much more, the way we have our own special language that many times others don't get, or just knowing when I need to have a break and he lets me, no questions asked or resentment. He is my partner in all areas of life.

10 years ago we said "I do" but it really was "I will". I will grow and change with each day but that growth is with you, not away from you. "I will" let our marriage and love be the example for our children to strive for when their time comes to find their soul mate. "I will" enjoy all the ways you are special and add so much to my life. "I will" respect you and your opinions (even though we know I am always right! :)). And "I will" love you forever!

10 years, not a bad way to start a lifetime together. Happy Anniversary Eric!!